In a few months I will be completing 25 years of being physically active with men, not sure if my Silver Jubilee is worth celebrating, but I don’t fail to celebrate the interesting ones that have come my way since I began writing this blog.
What do people say when unexpected expect happen to them - Oh my god? Here is an experience I had at OMG, a newly opened Desi Gay bar in the Castro area of San Francisco.
It was Halloween weekend and the club owners at OMG were expecting more people to stop by that night, but coming early always gets you the vantage seats and stares in the house. That night when I entered OMG he was the only one seated at the bar. My friend knew the owner/bar tender so he occupied the seat by the bar and besides him sat a fair and tall man, hair closely cropped and neatly gelled and was casually holding the drink and his demeanor beyond reasonable doubt confirmed that he was a local.
It is not common to meet strangers at the bar, befriend them for a quickie and move on. I am okay with that idea, but I hate men who incessantly stare, send confusing messages, and who don't show courage to come up and strike a conversation when interested. And during the ride to the bar that night I told me friends how such passive and shy men are a big turn-off for me.
The meat
Finally when I came back after doing my club recce, my friend introduced me to this ubersexual man. He readily put out his hands for a shake, while I had to hiss my name in his ears at the noisy bar. His eyes were not the roving kind; his chin was up, he held his drink steady and looked unlike many of the wam bam thank-you mam types, not atleast for tonight. We exchanged minimum personal information and I told him I was visiting from India and was just 24 hours from taking my flight, just incase he had bigger plans for us and then we went our ways at the bar.
Very soon the exotic costume clad women swarmed the floor and danced to some hot and groovy Bollywood songs. One of the women dancers was in her early 70s and she flew all the way from DC for the performance and I found this when I spoke to her after the performance. Infact I even told her she was turning me straight with the moves and the way she swerved her hip.
The dance to courtship….
Soon the man whom I met at the bar came from behind and asked me if I would like to dance with him. This was a question women folk were asked during the bride diligence process in those days, but I wasn't taken aback. But how sure can I be if this question was just a casual invite to dance and there was more to it? I openly confessed that I am not a dancer and threw back a challenge at him to either teach me to dance or tease me to get to dance.
He accepted my challenge and taught me a few steps. I danced a bit with him and that was when I discovered that the man was like a patiala glass, tall and broad, with palms as big as dinner plate (I could have a meal out of his palms) and his long and fleshy fingers were a big turn on. In the darkness at the club I saw my desire dancing in front of my eyes. But more than that what attracted me was his demeanor. He was calm and despite being on his sixth drink he was well behaved and far from being frivolous and silly.
And when you least expect…
Neither of us was at the bar that night looking for a pick-up or hook-up, but then why does life offer you something when you least expect? Every now and then I would see him with a gang of friends, but his eyes were curiously looking for me. Finally before I exited the bar, I went up to him to exchange good-bye courtesies and that is when he asked me about my plans and if he could come along with us to Castro.
Two months after we met, over Yahoo chat he tells me that he was attracted the moment he saw he entering the club and asked my friend who sat beside him for an introduction. That night we left OMG and walked towards the Castro area. Leaving the bar with a stranger, holding hands and kissing him during the tram ride to Castro and taking a few pictures was our way celebrating togetherness. In the end life comes down to good moments and memories and I don’t deprive myself and others of OMG moments!
Marriage talk in half-hour…
Did you guys just meet at the bar or do you know each other from before asked the half American and remaining Iranian girl in the queue outside Q bar at Castro. And when we said we had just met at the bar she remarked, “OMG” and said we were a cool couple and would like to be invited to our wedding. It was nice and refreshing to hear that, but don’t we all know that gay meets and dates are pretty much like trick or treat!
I excused myself to go to the CVS Pharmacy hardly a block away from Q bar to get a few bottles of water and suddenly he appears from the behind and tells me he wants to spend more time with me. Both of us were aware that I would leave the city in the next 14 hours and this infatuation will get us nowhere, but still this man was hunting down every minute to spend it with me. I also enjoyed the attention and company, and deep inside those were the two qualities that tore us apart in my previous relationship.
The two-way conversation…
We headed to a nearby snack place to feed his growling and intoxicated intestine. He tried to convince me to have a strip and insisted that he pay for it. Not sure if it was from the 6 drinks or it kindness was his innate nature, to add to this his non-sexual speech and touch made me hold his hands tighter. While he waited in the line to get his pizza, I let my emotion cool and engage in a two-way conversation with my intellect and fate. Why do I have to meet such a warm and loving person when I am getting ready to leave the country? Strangers are rarely come with such warmth and friendliness, so should I just draw the line of friendship and carry on with no emotion, desire or disappointment. Even if we decided to take it any further, distance and time-lag would make it impossible...OMG, why this? and why again?
The ride back home…
Come back next week....
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