Laissez-(af)faire!!

One of my chat friends asked me this morning about my love life. For many is it either a quest or a question mark. For me it doesn’t exist among mortals. After two 3 year relationships, a 3 year cooling period in between them, countless hook-ups in the name of coffee dates and catch, the word “love life” turned to an oxymoron without any doubt or deliberation.

Love life - an oxymoron!

From New York to New Zealand, everybody across the world is looking for love; there is nothing wrong about it. But almost all of us find sex that morphs as love, fuck buddies who morph as companions and quickies that morph as relationships. The result is a lot of disappointment and a long wait with hope. Wait for whom? Disappointment for what? My two boyfriends (committed and during our relationship) slept around with no guilt, so why should I deal with disappointment and wait with hope for the non-existent? It took a while for the blub to glow, but when it did, I stopped looking and accepting sex that comes as love, fuck buddies who pretend as partners and conveniently replaced love life with sex life. Yes, sex and life is real though it may rile a few.

Why question it when you just need to quench it?

Watch all that happens in the animal kingdom where sex is just another form of hunger. The animals play territorial games, establish their superiority, engage in mating games and move on. It is a truly “No Strings Attached” world. There is no emotional attachment, tears are unknown, heartbreaks are unheard, sex is never intellectualized or hyped, yet they peacefully live in groups, procreate, enjoy the world and care for each other. Yes happiness comes with freedom. And to them freedom is polygamy and not ploygamy.

Sex as a Service (SAS)

A foreigner who recently visited India told me that most gay Indian men claim to be bi-sexual even if they slept only with their wives. He also said that a lot of gay men also sleep around their boyfriends back. Both sets of men are honest and to them sex and life goes together and they satisfy their sense of hunger not the sense of belonging or security. So replace the legacy systems that come with high cost of maintenance and modernization with sex as a service (SAS) and enjoy the cloud model of relationships.

Married but available!

After meeting and dating single gay men who don’t know the difference between love and sex, life and hook-ups, I decided to meet married men to see if they were any better. When I say married, these can be either gay men with partners, bi-sexual men with wives or gay but married ones. Why discount and dissect them? Women would call me a “husband stealer” or the gay world would call me a “boyfriend moocher”, but who cares when sex comes without any disease or attachment.

Hook-ups without hiccups

Men in relationships are grounded, they give you all the freedom and space you desire and come together with a purpose but with no intention to posses or control. They have family to care but still find time, be it before work, during lunch time or after work to accommodate you. There are equally safe to protect their nest egg, while that saves us from gay drama, heartbreaks and keeping ourselves open to unlimited and never-ending fun. These are hook-ups without hiccups!

Enjoy the Laissez-faire

Turn to SAS and enjoy the care that comes without captivity, the freedom that comes without fear, and the love that comes with convenience to engage and disengage. Leave it to them to protect their marriage and family, enjoy that sex that comes without responsibility. The world may call it an affair, but to me it is Laissez-faire. What is life without freedom?

Sow your wild oats!

For people who often misunderstood sex for love and quickies for partnership, stop wasting time putting the L-word together. You may be duped and dumped, it is the “m” in between that makes you go from feeling cheated to feeling horrible. It is you who can turn that “M” as “Yum. Grab the opportunity to experience something wild and wholesome. So(w) your wild oats!

Seasons without reasons

Flush the past (it floats and smells), cherish the present without attachments, and enjoy the sex (don’t discriminate them based on their preference or marital status). One size doesn’t fit all and that is why we come in all shapes and sizes! Life is a shopping experience, you will never find everything in one store, learn to shop around. Wear men like clothes and jewellery, they may come and go with season, but they make you fashionable. So keep up with the world of fashion world and enjoy the seasons without any reasons.